Written by Jen Liu

“Meditation shows us, through countless tiny repeated failures to stay present, how critical acceptance is to developing wakefulness and intentionality. The valuable attitudinal shift of being able to meet whatever arises with acceptance is a wisdom we learn to develop in our mindfulness practice, and can take off the cushion to engage more authentically with life at large.”

Woven into the basic steps of mindfulness meditation are interconnected practices, like non-judgment and non-attachment, that relate to fostering acceptance. Cultivating the wisdom of acceptance is a crucial aspect of the contemplative path, as it helps us develop a skillful relational framework within which all things internal and external can be made workable, beginning with ourselves.

Built into the practice of mindfulness meditation is the undeniable fact that our minds will stray and do things we didn't intend, and a good place to start is learning to become aware of it. In contrast to a concentration exercise — which might be organized around how successfully one can focus on a single thing — mindfulness meditation actually would not be complete nor successful without that experience of straying. It is by developing acceptance towards our mind's straying that we learn to meet our mental proliferations with awareness and equanimity, and return to mindfulness.

By learning to accept the material of our minds with increased equanimity, we also reclaim the freedom to decide our next move. In meditation, a gentle acceptance that the mind has wandered acts as a prerequisite step to deciding to place awareness back on the breath, as most any other reaction to the distracted thought — such as frustration, shame, or delight — would likely cause the mind to spiral even further.

In this way, we can see how forces like clinging, aversion, and denial, which have a quality of resistance, carry the potential to increase suffering and prevent us from proceeding with clarity. Even the decision to make a radical change must first begin with acceptance, not denial, of the current state of things.

Meditation shows us, through countless tiny repeated failures to stay present, how critical acceptance is to developing wakefulness and intentionality. The valuable attitudinal shift of being able to meet whatever arises with acceptance is a wisdom we learn to develop in our mindfulness practice, and can take off the cushion to engage more authentically with life at large.